I noticed yesterday that my blog was receiving three times the usual number of visitors and because my inquiring mind wanted to know, I did a little investigating to find out where the traffic was coming from. I was led to a French website and a blog post containing a couple of my photographs (taken without my knowledge) along with what I think was meant to be a review of sorts. Being curious, I copied and pasted the text into google translate. The translation wasn’t great, but enough for me to get the impression that the words were meant to be flattering, but flattering in a way that made me feel uncomfortable. The article had been shared numerous times on facebook, and then there were comments as well. I should have just closed the site at this point, but instead I started copying and pasting comments into the translator, afraid of what I might read, but wanting to know. Most people commenting were not reading my words here because my blog is in English (although I did add a button in my sidebar today so that it can be translated now.) They were simply looking at my photographs, and forming opinions about me and my family which feels terribly unfair whatever the opinion formed is. Again, the translations that I obtained weren’t perfect, but I think I was able to get what people were saying. Many had nice things to say, although false assumptions based on my photographs were numerous and made me feel like a fraud. I do enjoy photography and of course my favorite subject is anything surrounding my family and nature, not because I want to “show them off” but because I love them. However, “Lovely and inspiring” photographs do not translate to the perfect life being lived by the “perfect mother” on the other side of the lens. I’ve made my share of apologies to my children during this week alone. One commenter noted that I obviously have a very large home amongst other luxuries (there are eight of us in 1500 square feet, and to get a needed second vehicle my husband is trading labor for a car because we can’t afford a car payment. We’re pretty ordinary.)
There were lots of negative comments criticizing me for painting my life as perfect, for sharing what is unattainable by most, and refusing to show the “runny noses.” I was accused of staging my life for this blog (Precisely what I enjoy taking photos of and sharing here are the real moments that make up a day. I am just good at grabbing the camera. This is why I could never be a portrait photographer. I am not inspired by staged photography. Although I do specifically take somewhat staged photos of finished objects of course.) One woman compared my family to the family of one of her neighbors: people who homeschool seven children, keep horses, and somehow drop horse dung on her property while simultaneously waking her up too early in the morning. I am not upset by these judgements because I too have been guilty of making my own judgements based on the surface, or what I choose to see. And I should add that some of the women commenting left completely non judgemental comments appreciating what this blog is meant to be and defending that. What upset me is that I could only be a spectator of this running commentary about me and my family. I couldn’t say, “But wait, we’re not all that different!” You must be registered on this site to leave a comment, and of course I don’t speak French.
I didn’t get to look any of these women in the eye and say, “Please don’t compare yourself or your life to mine. I am just a mom, like you. I am always a sinner, rarely a saint. We’ve made many a sacrifice to live the life we do, and while it may look different than yours, it is neither inferior nor superior. We are simply living our calling to the best of our ability and only by the Grace of God. I carry joy through both my good days and my bad because I know the love of my Creator, and I can literally see His love all around me: in the faces of my children, in the flowers that grow on the side of the road, in the bees flying to and from their hives. Please understand that I take and share my photos because they reflect for me the Author of life, and His gifts to me (and to you!) I share them here to hopefully make you smile, to share my joy with you, not to fill your heart with comparisons or shame.”
But you know, then there would be those who would simply discount me as a religious lunatic. That’s okay with me. I don’t come here to preach, but when things get personal, I can’t remove my faith from my response.
I accept that keeping a public journal opens me up to judgement of all sorts. I have to either be okay with that or quit sharing here. I hate the thought of someone visiting this place and walking away discouraged or angry. My purpose in writing this is not to say, “Poor me, I was judged.” My concern is for the mom who saw a handful of pretty photographs and looked around her and saw the laundry piled up, the kids still in their pajamas, and the handprints on the windows and made a comparison. I have those things as well. But, I am not going to start documenting runny noses, or messy rooms in my photographs. We’d all get tired of that quickly. But sometimes it’s good I think, in this strange world of blogging and online sharing, that we remind ourselves that behind the screens we are all human: flawed and frail and with feelings. We are meant to try and love each other despite our shortcomings and our failings. We’ve all got dirty laundry.
I must add that Jonny was greatly amused by all the bad translations spit out by Google Translate. While he wasn’t bothered by the comments themselves, he feels slighted that the words, “handsome husband” never appeared. “That’s just low.” “It’s mean,” he says.
updated to add: The author of the original post on the French blog contacted me with an apology for taking my photos without permission and also for the way the comments turned, which obviously was out of her control. She was very kind and offered to make amends in whatever way I chose. (Her kind words were enough.)
Anyway…Do you want to see what we’ve been working on around here? Okay.
The bathroom has moved from the being ripped out phase to the being rebuilt phase. This could take awhile.
I am almost finished with Larkspur’s Bulle.
I am on track with my Winterwoods Sampler.
And, I made Silas some new pants. I’ve got a second pair cut out as well.
(The fabric is from the Moda Kasuri line. The pattern is from Handmade Beginnings
It’s amazing what having a house in chaos can do for my crafty productivity. While I am not about to show off our messy house, here’s what our front porch looks like right now.
And now I will close this “too serious for my taste post on what is supposed to be my lots of fun blog.”
Thank you, all of you who are able to visit this place and appreciate what I share here. I appreciate you all more than I can say.
I love your inspirational posts and your photography! I am a French homeschooling mother of three in NC! Please don’t hesitate to email me if you need help with translations.
i rarely comment, but yours is a favorite blog of mine and the main reason behind that is i feel you share both the positive and the negative on a pretty equal scale. many blogs seem to rarely showcase the reality, and while it may not be in your photographs it is often there in your text–the frustrations, the shortcomings that you put upon yourself. of course, this is all balanced with your wonderful craftiness and inspiring family life. thanks for this blog, ginny!
As a Christian family….you just keep showing your life, your love of nature and your love of simple things! It is what speaks to all of us!!! I love your blog, your posts, your pictures and your heart!!! ♥♥♥
First , let me say just how sorry I am that people sometimes are just judgmental dopes! I come here to your blog to see you and your family in pics. The every day little things; like pouts and curls and bathrooms being torn up! Stay just the way you guys are! BTW…Jonny is the man!
I enjoy your blog because I feel that it is honest. You aren’t showing off, you are a talented photographer and you have a beautiful family, and you document what you see around you. I think people have a tendency to be rude on line, whether in English or French, or whatever language, and its an unfortunate state of affairs. I guess the feeling of anonymity online contributes to that. Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing your corner of the world with us. I keep thinking of blogging, but I’m scared away by just that sort of thing.
Jennifer
Oh, Ginny. What can I say? Your blog probably has the most truth to the pictures shown then any other blog that I read. How many photos have I seen of marker on your kids’ faces? You are good at showing us what is going on, and I agree that the good things are what is nice to see. Isn’t that what life is about? Finding the good, getting through the bad? I don’t need more bad to wade through. I’ve got enough here. Keep on with your method here in your space. I truly enjoy it.
I wish I could help you wash and fold your laundry, play with your children, and weed your garden. Being around your family would be a delightful treat!
Oh Dear, Sigh, People!!!
I send you a cyber hug, and a cyber cup of tea Ginny.
I don’t blog, so I am not vulnerable to these kind of things.
Keep up the good work, I LOVE your blog, Especially I love the book reccommendations for my boys, and I will one day finally start knitting because of you and all your industry.
May God Bless you all
Michelle
yours is one of the blogs that i look forward to reading every day/week.it is filled with the light and love and reality of raising a family,planting a garden,knitting a sweater…the simple things in this world that make life truly worth living.your honesty is inspiring. your love is comforting.your joy is palpable.yours is the life that i had dreamed about living 30yrs ago,before mine took a turn in the opposite direction of sustainability and simplicity.i smile every time i read your words.and i laugh at pictures of children,cats and chickens…:) p.s.it looks like jonny,your “handsome husband” is doing an awesome job on that bathroom!!!
I love your blog. You inspire me to be a better Mom, get outside more often, and accept that sometimes you must do without. Please don’t take some ignorant comments to heart. I like comming to your blog. Don’t change a thing.
Good luck getting the second bathroom up and running quickly. I have heard that same story (unfortunately) from many a popular blogger. I’m not sure why people feel the need to get catty or disgruntled with people they don’t know and aren’t talking to face-to-face. I love reading your “real life” and hope you continue for a long time sharing your ordinary life escapades. (You can continue to leave out runny noses and tantrums; we have plenty of those here that I don’t need to see more online.) 😉
Thank goodness that we all agree I think that tantrums, runny noses, and laundry piles aren’t good blogging material!! Thanks Joy!! Love, Ginny
Ginny, I found your blog recently, and have really enjoyed the Yarn Along. What I have read in the few weeks I have been reading has only ever been authentic. I am a homeschooling mom of four on a tight budget, who would be happy to welcome more kiddos into our family, and one of the reasons I connected with your blog is that I can relate to it – your life and experiences don’t seem so different from my own. Please don’t be discouraged by what you read on that site, and know that no matter what thoughtless people may say, you are precious in the eyes of your Father, your children are blessed by the gift of your mothering love amd presence, and your readers always find something beautiful here that they can relate to or be inspired by. Hope the rest of your week is full of joy and peace.
I don’t often comment on your blog, Ginny, but this post was great. You tell it like it is, that’s all. Your life….I mean. And by the way, I love Silas’s new pants! I’d like to make some in my size. 🙂
Ginny I feel like you are so real! I find your blog truly inspiring!! You and I have emailed back and forth a bit, and I just think you’re a real sweetie! Still want you to be my neighbor 🙂
Now on a lighter note….pattern for those awesome pants??
Yes!! I forgot to include that important detail. They are the quick change trousers from Handmade Beginnings. Thanks for all your sweet words as always Leah! Love, Ginny
As everyone is saying – I love your blog – for it’s simplicity, beauty and honesty. You share so much and don’t need to apologize for any of it – you express yourself in ways few of us are able to and the love you have in your family is something that draws me and makes me think what a beautiful life you have. Your struggles throughout the years are what made your family stronger and so special. Thank you for sharing all that you do.
And – I speak French – if you need help with any translating or want to post something on their site – just ask.
ariele
Thank you for your offer! Since writing this post, I have been contacted by the author of the post on the French blog. She was very kind and even offered to translate this entire post and add it to the comment section! I felt that would be overkill, and I just accept that this was meant to be for some reason!
I rarely comment, but I just have to say: I’ve been reading for a while now, and I have always appreciated your honesty with some of your struggles alongside all the beauty. Thank you!
Hi Ginny ~ I for one LOVE your blog and enjoy reading your posts and all the things you share. What is so sad about this situation is that people are very brave on the internet and often quite hurtful (had it happen over at my blog too). Don’t let that get you down. In the long run, you have a fantastic group of dedicated followers and you are truly inspirational!
Hi, Ginny! I’m a relatively new reader to your blog and I rarely comment . . . but I just wanted to say that I love your little blogspot. I like to be inspired by other mamas in terms of knitting, homemaking, photography and living for Christ. Thanks for your contributions each week. There are many of us who really love you! (Your husband, I think, has the same humor mine has!)
Plus, I think most of those people didn’t pay close enough attention. I’ve been reading your blog for less than a month, and already I’ve read about a spongy bathroom floor and a jacked-up shoulder that brought Mama to tears in front of her children. I think you’re very honest and forthright about your life — its beauty and challenges. Perhaps you are just blessed enough to focus more on the beauty, and you grace all of us with that perception.
I try to keep my blog positive and uplifting as well. Who wants to read about/look at pictures of sadness and sorrow? I have noticed that some people I know in real life assume that my life is all roses and puppies. Of course it’s not. But because I only blog about happy things, when I am having a down day I can visit my blog, read my old posts, look at my old pictures, and give myself a little sunshine to brighten my mood.
I appreciate the glimpses of your life that you share in this space. Your photos inspire me. I hope you don’t let a few naysayers dampen your mood.
Sigh . . .your blog is always inspiring to me, never makes me feel inadequate, just motivated. I think you and your handsome husband are not very ordinary at all, in that you are earning the “money” for another car instead of putting it on credit with no idea how you’ll pay for it, which is, sadly, more typical in the USA. Your blog is lovely, and I must say that I feel sad for the poor souls who sniped at it. They must be rather unhappy with their lives, I think. I appreciate the good energy you spread with this blog. As my 12-year-old niece says, Love your haters! (Which I bet you are already doing–you seem like someone who took the lesson “turn the other cheek” to heart.)
Please don’t show me your sink full of dishes, piles of dirty laundry and above all else stringy haired snotty nosed little ones. I would never allow my children to go out in public unkept why would I post photos of them looking that way?! I have my own house that is never clean enough, why would I want to look at someone else’s? This is where I escape, and find inspiration and encouragement. Keep up the good work. Pat pat pat.(patting you on the back)
Well said, Anna.
I just found your blog last week and I am in love with it! I’ve found so much inspiration here. Ignore the ugly comments. Focus on the beauty.
See, now, I KNOW for a fact everything here is made up and staged, because how EVER do you keep your poetry books on open-ended shelves, without them falling off? Eh?
(Kidding, so kidding!!! You poor dear. Also, I think Jonny has a point; he really should have been better represented in French. )
I do hope your shoulder is feeling better. And those pants are the bomb. And I really would like to know how the books don’t tumble 🙂
xo,
Molly
Dear, dear Molly. Ikea bookends keep our Shel Silverstein collection standing. That is all. Sadly, I don’t think they sell them anymore. At least not the ones that I have. (Jonny is recovering by the way. There has been many a mention of my handsome husband in the comments on this post today.) SO good to hear from you!! Love, Ginny
Ginny,
I just love your blog!! I was saddened to hear that some small minded people have the NERVE to criticize you for what you are doing. They are simply ignorant people. Please do not let them darken your spirit and keep you from doing something wonderful that you like to do. You truly bring joy and happiness to anyone with any sense that reads your blog. Your family is beautiful, your journalings are inspirational and your photography is gorgeous. Please don’t stop blogging because of a few ignorant people that are being critical!!
Best wishes always!
I’m pretty sure every blogger worth their salt doesn’t show ‘warts and all’. We show what we want to. It’s for the ignorant to take that as the gospel truth of anyone’s lives really.
People on the internet just like to be cruel. But I would be upset too.
xox
Ginny, I want you to know how much I enjoy your blog! I read every post as time allows and truly enjoy the beautiful photos. I admire the life you and Jonny have created.
Thank you!
I love your blog, find what you do share very inspiring and I find you to be a very thoughtful and authentic blogger, and that is why I read your blog. Sorry to here that you experienced something rather negative as a result of your blogging (how many times can I write the word blog in one comment!?) I need to make some of those sweet pants, so adorable, I love the fabric choice and that yarn color is gorgeous!!
The pants are from Handmade Beginnings. It’s a fun pattern!
Thanks for the info, I will have to make some. I spelled hear wrong above, eek!
I’m sorry that people can be so negative…..I’ve seen similar discussions about Amanda Soule (“Soulemama”). While it’s tempting to feel a bit jealous that the two of you run circles around my daily routine, it’s not okay to be nasty and judgmental. The lens we see your family through is very narrow, and assuming we know everything about you is absurd. Keep doing what you do, knowing that many of us visit your site regularly because we enjoy the perspective and look for inspiration. As my 12-year-old son would say, “Haters gonna hate.” 🙂
I wouldn’t worry about what anyone says. You are a great person and have a wonderful family.
Keep on bloggin because I love yours.
xxx
Hi! I’m one of the french mums who commented on this french website. I’m really sorry if my comment hurt you! I wrote that I was jealous of your “perfect life”, I wrote that you seem to be a “perfect mother”, but it’s not to be taken at face value… I wrote that, at that moment, because I’ve got two children, (almost three, I’m pregnant!) and it’s very difficult for me now to be a “good housewife”…
My apologies! and congratulations for your beautiful blog, pics and knittings (and children!).
God bless you and your lovely family!
Lydie/Melisande
Dear Lydie, Thank you so much. I am afraid that much was lost in translation and I may have misunderstood some of the comments. And yes, it’s very difficult to be a good wife and mother at times, pregnancy can be very difficult! love, Ginny
All of the above, and please tell Jonny that I think he is a very handsome husband! (There must be a defect in the translation program.)
snorting 🙂 Yes, a defect indeed.
Oh Ginny! I’ve been reading your blog for over 4 years (Feb. 2008, I think). In fact, your blog archive doesn’t doesn’t go back to the post that I began reading. You were not a photographer, had only 3 children and new to knitting (or was it sewing?). Your blog was compelling because you blogged from your heart. Over the years the family has grown and you’ve vulnerably shared so much of your life. Yet through it all you’ve been humble and faithful. It’s an inspiration. It’s too bad so many of the French readers couldn’t read your words. You’re faith and grace shine. You don’t have to say it’s all a credit to the Lord, your surrender to Him is on each page.
Thank you, Ginny, for staying online all this time. ~ molly
Dear Molly, Thank you so much. I am always touched by your comments. This one made me cry!!
love, Ginny
Dear Ginny, Thank you so much for your reply! I’ve assumed I’m a lurker with little to offer: no children or husband nothing but an old blog I don’t update. You, on the other hand, add so much to my life I’ve felt silly commenting. thank you Ginny! ~ molly
small things is one of only two blogs that I visit every day to see if there is a new post. I came across your blog when I was at a point of great struggle in my own parenting/homeschooling journey. I found such honesty and beauty in your photos and writing; it was calming and uplifting yet real and relatable. I love the sharing of the ‘everyday’, the beautiful photographs, the personal stories, the crafty endeavours , the outdoor adventures, your Faith. All of it. Thank you Ginny, please keep sharing.
while your children are gorgeous, and your life seems pretty good, I would never assume that your life (or anyones) is perfect and noone ever has a snotty nose. Seems an odd thing to worry about being absent on your blog! The frustration of not being able to reply would infuriate me, and for them to decide to discuss your blog is really odd as well….
We who read English know your honesty…and criticism and envy are the flip side of popularity. You have a fantastic blog and you do several things very well, and you create marvelous photos of your beautiful children, so yes, you are going to be a target for envy. You know, there was a blog I loved and had to break free of because the woman did not seem honest, unless she honestly never had a mess in her home or a bad day. Everything was presented as magazine-feature-perfect all the time, and it made me grouchy and competitive.
You are loved : )
So are you 🙂
I really love your blog, and I dont need to see runny noses or how messy the house is, we all have that in our own homes dont we. I love your blog because of the way you write and seeing your gorgeous children, your beautiful handknits and a bit of nature on the other side of the world from me. We are adults, and we are responsible for our own homes and circumstances too, even though sometimes we can be dealt harderships more than others it is up to us to find the solution to it. Keep blogging and being you! I hope the bathroom reno doesnt take too long for you.
I am so glad you share what you do Ginny, and I think your blog is absolutely ‘real’ enough without losing that sense of calm and beauty that I feel whenever I visit. Clearly those who think you portray a perfect and unachievable life have only seen a select few images here, and probably not read your words.
I know a lot of people feel that sharing pictures of their children on the internet is ‘dangerous’. Sometimes I feel like I should listen to the worriers, but I really enjoy looking into the lives of others (in a nice way) and I like to think the right people will enjoy my pictures too.
And your husband is indeed handsome 🙂 I’m so glad you haven’t lost your sense of humour over this.
I want to add my two cents worth. I really enjoy your blog and make no assumptions in any way about your life. Its just nice to see a family growing up and read (and see) things that make our days pass nicely through your eyes.
I also want to add that if it weren’t for your blog, I would not have found your “Sunday Sweater” pattern, which is a joy to knit and is very well written. Thank you!
I’m so glad that you like the pattern!! Thanks for your kind words!
Hi Ginny,
One of the things I love about your blog is that you are honest about your struggles and challenges. Please don’t let this experience affect the way you share with us.
Sharon
Your blog is inspiring and I think most of us understand that you’re not going to be blogging about all the imperfections of motherhood! Just ignore them 🙂 I love your photography by the way and if it inspires anything in me, it is to spend more time with my children!
I haven’t read all the comments here so I hope I’m not repeating everyone else. I think most people realize that “behind the scenes” is just regular life for blog authors. I don’t want to look at my own laundry piles, why would I want to look at yours? 🙂
That being said, I find your blog inspiring. For bad or good, my life will never be like yours but you often give me ideas (especially for crafty things) and remind me to stop and recognized how blessed I am in so many small ways.
Thank you for your blog, please don’t change. 🙂
Well I’m not reading all the comments here, but I’m sure they all feel the same way as I do…… Do not change your blog! I love coming here!, I love your photos, I love that you have never given a holier than thou attitude. You’re so normal and down to earth and frankly that oozes out of your photos and writing. I have never felt disouraged by you, in fact quite the opposite! You inspire me to see more beauty and fun in each day! You inspire me to work hard at my knitting, so I can move on to more complicated projects! Frankly, if you start posting messy rooms and snotty noses, I probably would not come and visit your space… I see that every day here!! I’m thinking of that part in Shrek, where he sings “Don’t go changin’, to try and please me” x
Love your blog, space and projects big and small. I don’t see gloating and showing off perfection in your blog. I see your gratitude, pure and simple. It’s easy to see the bad, but seeing the good sometimes is hard to see. I see all the wonderful things around you, which in turn, allows me see the wonderful things around me. The half completed knitted sweater, the kids running down the drive, the flowers. All things to be gratitude for. Thank you for sharing that with me.
I love your blog, your family, your beautiful pictures! The way you and your family ! The way you see the world and life! And your truly faith in God! Keep the blog the way it is, it’s very inspiring and heartning!
Eliane
Love love love you Ginny!! I am jealous of you! I wish I could ignore the people around me and homeschool- I want to so so so bad. But I don’t(yet).
Oh, and such a handsome husband! 😉
It must be a weird feeling to not be able to respond- but know that we know you have a hidden mountain of laundry – just like the rest of us
xoxoxoxo
Isn’t it hard to ignore? I really, really wanted to ignore this whole French blog thing. Oh well. I am glad the laundry thing is all out in the open now though. 🙂
I just have to say, something I have always appreciated about your blog – amidst the beautiful photos and the seemingly dreamy life of hand-knits and bees (at least that’s what my dream life consists of 😉 – is that you always manage to seem so very genuine. I love looking in here, because it does give me joy and make me smile. I’m so pleased that you share His gifts here.
Dear Ginny,
I’m a Portuguese catholic stay at home mom of four. One boy three girls, and unfortunally can’t have more.
In Europe (not in the UK) there aren’t many staying at home moms it is ones choice and often people don’t see it with very good eyes.
I love reading your blog ,and I know that no one has a perfect life but you just want to show the good moments and some not so good in your blog… That is why I love to read you. I love your pictures and your house and specially your garden. It is peacefull…
Keep on blogging and taking pictures.
Please excuse my not so good english it is a bit “rusty”
Rita
Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to comment. Your English is great! I am in awe of anyone who can speak more than one language! I sure can’t!
if you had pictures of laundry piles, or runny noses I might NOT come here because I have the same at home ;o)
I first started to read your blog (few months ago) because of your knitting (I think I found your blog via Ravelry).
Living on the 21st floor of a condo you can imagine how I love looking at your “farm-living style” / outdoors pictures.
I love “hand” sewn with love pants for toddlers – I wish I could still sew some pairs to my girls ;o).
can’t wait to see your progress on your embroidery…and your Bulle ;o)
I think you have a lovely blog and while none of have a perfect life, it is always best to remember and portray the positive, I believe. You do that well and you and your blog inspire me. Thanks for sharing and keeping doing what you do!